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Blonde joke


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I'm taking no credit for this, it isn't mine :(

I found it on ghost recon.om's boards:

Three blondes are walking through the forst, and the come upon some tracks.

The first says "I think they're bear tracks!" the second " No, rabit tracks" the third "you are both wrong they're deer tracks". They all look up and get hit by a train.

:blink:

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:D

A blond woman was having financial troubles so she decided to kidnap a

child and demand a ransom. She went to a local park, grabbed a little

boy, took him behind a tree and wrote this note: "I have kidnapped

your child. I am sorry to do this but I need the money. Leave

$10,000 in a plain brown bag behind the big oak tree in the park at 7

a.m. tomorrow. Signed, 'The Blond.'"

She pinned the note inside the little boy's jacket and told him to go

straight home. The next morning, she returned to the park to find the

$10,000 in a brown bag behind the big oak tree, just as she had

instructed.

Inside the bag was the following note: "Here is your money. I cannot

believe that one blond would do this to another."

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LMAO@check6 :lol:

LMAO@The_Slink :lol:

LMAO@avey2904 :lol:

Santa Claus, the Easter Bunny, the Tooth Fairy, a smart blonde, and a dumb blonde are walking down the street when they spot a $100 on the ground. Who gets it?

Nobody. The first four don't exist and the dumb blonde thought it was a gum wrapper.

EDIT:SNIP! Funny, but keep it out of here, please. -- Jester (your friendly, neighborhood admin)

:lol:

*Added*Sorry there, didnt know.Can do.

Edited by Zantar45
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  • 3 weeks later...

Three blondes died and found themselves standing before St. Peter. He

told them that before they could enter the Kingdom, they had to tell him

what Easter represented.

The first blonde said, "Easter is a holiday where they have a big feast

and we give thanks and eat turkey

" St. Peter said, "Noooooo," and he banished her to Hell.

The second blonde said, "Easter is when we celebrate Jesus' birth and

exchange gifts.

" St. Peter said, "Noooooo," and he banished her to Hell.

The third blonde said she knew what Easter was, and St. Peter said, "So,

tell me."

She said, "Easter is a Christian holiday that coincides with the Jewish

festival of Passover. Jesus was having Passover feast with His disciples

when He was betrayed by Judas, and the Romans arrested Him. The Romans

hung Him on the cross and eventually He died. Then they buried Him in a

tomb behind a very large boulder ... "

St. Peter said, "Verrrrrry good."

Then the blonde continued, "Now, every year the Jews roll away the

boulder and Jesus comes out. If he sees his shadow, we have six more

weeks of hockey."

St. Peter fainted.

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i got a couple:

Q: What do you call a smart blond?

A: A golden retriever

Hear about the blonde that got an AM radio?

It took her a month to realise she could play it at night.

Q: How can you tell when a fax had been sent from a blonde?

A: There is a stamp on it.

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read this on the 7S Forum: posted by John_Pain:

----- Original KILLER BISCUITS WANTED FOR ATTEMPTED MURDER (the actual AP headline)

Linda Burnett, 23, a resident of San Diego, was visiting her in-laws, and

while there went to a nearby supermarket to pick up some groceries.

Several people noticed her sitting in her car with the windows rolled up and

with her eyes closed, with both hands behind the back of her head.

One customer who had been at the store for a while became concerned and

walked over to the car. He noticed that Linda's eyes were now open, and she

looked very strange.

He asked her if she was okay, and Linda replied that she'd been shot in the

back of the head, and had been holding her brains in for over an hour.

The man called the paramedics, who broke into the car because the doors were

locked and Linda refused to remove her hands from her head.

When they finally got in, they found that Linda had a wad of bread dough on

the back of her head.

A Pillsbury biscuit canister had exploded from the heat, making a loud noise

that sounded like a gunshot, and the wad of dough hit her in the back of her

head. When she reached back to find out what it was, she felt the dough and

thought it was her brains. She had initially passed out, but quickly

recovered and tried to hold her brains in for over an hour until someone

noticed and came to her aid.

And, yes, Linda is a blonde.

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