Jump to content

Couple of Jokes


Crimson

Recommended Posts

A hippie on a bus notices a nun sitting across from him. He gets up and sits next to her and says, "Id really like to have sex with you". The nun responds with, "Im a nun, I believe in abstinance". At the next bus stop, the nun and the hippie get off the bus. As the hippie is walking by the bus driver, the driver says, "So, I hear you want to score with the nun. Heres what you do: Every night she goes to pray at the local cematary to pray to God. Dress up as God and your in". Sure enough, the nun is at the cematary, praying to God. The hippie confronts her, dressed as God with a mask on and says, "I command you to have sex with me". The nun says, "Okay, but we will do it anally, so I wont lose my virginity". After they are done, the hippie pulls off his mask and says, "Hahaha! Its the hippie from the bus". The nun pulls off her mask and says, "Hahahah! Its me, the bus driver".

Why did the priest go to Wal-Mart?

He heard the boys pants are half off.

If these offend anyone, let me know please.

Edited by Crimson
Link to comment
Share on other sites

heard the bus driver one before.....

heard a diff versionof the other one,

why did micheal jackson go to walmart?

boys pants were half off

which reminds me

why are mcdonalds and wacko jacko (micheal jackson) similar?

they both stuff dirty meat in 8 year old buns!

Elton John and Micheal Jackson are in heaven, St Peter (???is that correct???) tells them they have to go through three rooms of temptation and if they make it through alive they get into heaven (alive because if they have slight temptaion they lose a limb big temptation they explode) They say okay lets go through the rooms, the first room is a bunch of hot naked chicks, they look around, nothing happens, and they move on, in the second room is a bunch of sheep, (don't ask me, ask who ever made this up) they look around nothing happens and they move on, in the third room it's a bunch of small children, micheal jacksons arm falls off he bends over to pick it up and elton john explodes. HAHAHAHA well this econd one isn't to funny...... but the first one is!

why didn't superman save lives on Sept 11?

that guys in a wheelchair you heartless ######.

oh and by the wway im 15... and this stuff is like something the most liberal and "equlity" and kind and religious person would say compared to the ###### that i hear walking down the halls at school ( i live ina small redneck town) i hear the most racist and offensive things at school every day! this is tame!

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Funny jokes, heard variations of them too.

BTW, where is Jester? I posted a mild head and shoulder joke about a blonde and got warned and you guys talk about packin kids and bus drivers. :o

Dont mind me, I guess I'm having a off day.

:huh:

:rolleyes:

<_<

stick in the mud indeed

Link to comment
Share on other sites

sick but so funny! :lol:

like happy tree friends

it might look like crappy kid's cartoons but watch one though :devil:

i puting a warning on this cos it may cause massive mental trauma to children!

No you didn't! :o

Yes you did!.....................Now everyone is going to know how disturbed you are! ;)

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

×
×
  • Create New...