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lets hear your best pickup lines


shadow2k1

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Ok,

Disclaimer. None of these are mine. All taken from previous threads/emails/overheard by a mate. Not guaranteed to work, and may result in personal injury. Use cautiously!!

Fancy a ####?

NO!

Well, mind laying down while i have one?

Your legs are the word!

Wanna come back to my place and spread the word?

If i could rearrange the alphabet, i'd put U and I together.

Here's 10p, go phone your mother and tell her you wont be home until morning!

My face leaves here in 10 minutes. Be on it.

As long as i have a face, you've got somewhere to sit.

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To be unsexest, it would only be fair after my last post to provide suitable come back lines to the ladies out there.

WAYS TO TURN MEN DOWN

>>>>HE: Can I buy you a drink?

>>>>SHE: Actually I'd rather have the money.

>>>>HE: I'm a photographer. I've been looking for a face like yours.

>>>>SHE: I'm a plastic surgeon. I've been looking for a face like yours.

>>>>HE: Hi. Didn't we go on a date once? Or was it twice?

>>>>SHE: Must've been once. I never make the same mistake twice.

>>>>HE: How did you get to be so beautiful?

>>>>SHE: I must've been given your share.

>>>>HE: Will you go out with me this Saturday?

>>>>SHE: Sorry. I'm having a headache this weekend.

>>>>HE: Your face must turn a few heads.

>>>>SHE: And your face must turn a few stomachs.

>>>>HE: Go on, don't be shy. Ask me out.

>>>>SHE: Okay, get out.

>>>>HE: I think I could make you very happy.

>>>>SHE: Why? Are you leaving?

>>>>HE: What would you say if I asked you to marry me?

>>>>SHE: Nothing. I can't talk and laugh at the same time.

>>>>HE: Can I have your name?

>>>>SHE: Why? Don't you already have one?

>>>>HE: Shall we go see a movie?

>>>>SHE: I've already seen it.

>>>>HE: Where have you been all my life?

>>>>SHE: Hiding from you.

>>>>HE: Haven't I seen you some place before?

>>>>SHE: Yes. That's why I don't go there! anymore.

>>>>HE: Is this seat empty?

>>>>SHE: Yes, and this one will be too if you sit down.

>>>>HE: So, what do you do for a living?

>>>>SHE: I'm a female impersonator.

>>>>HE: Hey baby, what's your sign?

>>>>SHE: Do not enter.

>>>>HE: Your body is like a temple.

>>>>SHE: Sorry, there are no services today.

>>>>HE: If I could see you naked, I'd die happy.

>>>>SHE: If I saw you naked, I'd probably die laughing.

>>>>HE: Where have you been all my life?

>>>>SHE: Where I'll be the rest of your life in your wildest dreams.

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Well,

I'm happily married now with two small kids, but I gotta tell you. Go to the grocery store or the local mall with one of the little ones and you get more attention than can be imagined. I'm the loyal husband and would never stray from the path, but it's still kinda neat.

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Guy : "A yacht and a million dollars"

Girl: "What?"

Guy: "Well you're hear...I just wanted my other two wishes..."

Hold cell phone...When girl approaches hang up and say: "I was worried sick. I was calling hospitals, police department, I thought you'd never get here."

DISCLAIMER: Second line is guaranteed to get you one of the following:

a) An honest to goodness set of digits...

b) A criminal summons for stalking, including bonus night in the pokey where the following conversation would be heard...

Bubba: "A yacht and a million dollars..."

You: "What?" (you get the point) :rolleyes:

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wanna see a trick i learned in prison??

wanna sit over here where its safe from my fart??

is that a lazy eye or are u drunk ?

how much did u pay for your breasts ?

my mother has that same dress

of course these are bad pickup lines lol thast the point i gottem of a joke song

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I find this works the best:

How about you and me baby going back to my house and using my T1 connection and getting down to some hard core GR sessions!?

Works every time! ;)

Hey leave me out of your dirty little plans :huh:

;)

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I usually prefer to ask girls if they want to come and watch re-runs of star trek. if they hesitate, I offer to let them wear my federation starship uniform and plastic Spock ears. who could resist?

on a more serious note, i think the smoothest i've ever been was in florida during spring break. I saw this girl chillin with some dude. she was quite good looking and knowing that hot girls usually have hot friends, I proceeded to ask her if she had any friends who were as pretty as she was. getting a smile and a giggle, she points me over to her friends and tells me to tell them that Sandra (or Sandy or Sarah, can't remember) sent me. off i went to go hang out with her friends. a little later on I ran into her again, only this time without the guy... I can't remember what i said, but it was something along the lines of "i'm very disappointed in you for lying to me... you're obviously much better looking than your friends." Then i told her she'd have to make it up to me and got to chatting about this and that. for the record, nothing came of it - but I was still pretty slick, so I thought I'd better mention it. :rocky:

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I find this works the best:

How about you and me...hard core GR sessions!?

Works every time! ;)

lol.. you're full of.... yeah.

Anyway...@FuSaKi, sounds good. Were you able to pull it off with a smile and muscle flexing? :)

I find, that "Hi, how are you?" works the best. Then make up some... yea, to discuss.

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