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Why did the chicken cross the Road?

Posted March, 2003

George W. Bush

      We don't really care why the chicken crossed the road.  We just want to know if the chicken is on our side of the road or not.  The chicken is either with us or it is against Us.  There is no middle ground here.

Al Gore

      I invented the Chicken.  I invented the Road.  Therefore, the chicken crossing the road represented the application of these two different functions of government in a new, reinvented way designed to bring greater services to the American people.

Colin Powell

      Now at the left of the screen, you clearly see the satellite image of the chicken crossing the road.

Hanz Blix

      We have reason to believe there is a chicken, but we have not yet been allowed access to the other side of the road.

Mohammed Aldouri (Irag ambassador)

      The chicken did not cross the road. this is a complete fabrication.  We don't even have a chicken.

Saddam Hussein

      This was an unprovoked act of rebellion and we were quite justified in dropping 50 tons of nerve gas on it.

Ralph Nader

      The chicken's habitat on the original side of the road had been polluted.

Barbara Walters

      Isn't that interesting? In a few moments we will be listening to the chicken tell for the first time, the heartwarming story of how it experienced a serious case of molting and went on to accomplish its life-long dream of crossing the road.

John Lennon

      Imagine all the chickens crossing roads in peace.

Aristotle

      It is the nature of chickens to cross the road

Karl Marx

      It was  a historical inevitability

Voltaire

      I may not agree with what the chicken did, but I will defend to the death it's right to do it.

Ronald Reagan

      What chicken?

Captain Kirk

      To boldly go where no chicken has gone before.

Fox Mulder

      You saw it cross the road with your own eyes! How many more Chickens have to cross before you believe it?

Sigmund Freud

      The fact that you are at all concerned that the chicken crossed the road reveals your underlying sexual insecurity.

Bill Gates

      I have just released eChicken 2003, which will not only cross roads, but will lay eggs, file your important documents, and balance your checkbook - and Internet Explorer is an inextricable part of eChicken

Albert Einstein

      did the chicken really cross the road or did the road move beneath the chicken?

Bill Clinton

      I did not cross the road with THAT chicken.  What do you mean by chicken? Could you define chicken, please?

Colonel Sanders

      I missed one?

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Budda : If you ask this question, you deny your own chicken nature.

Slavador Dali : The fish

Molly Yard : It was a hen

Jack Nicholson : 'Cause it (censored) wanted to. That's the (censored) reason

Darwin : It was the logical next step after coming down from the trees

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